so 2014 has come and gone… and there was nothing great about it. 

First In a Long Time….

i’m steady moving backwards,

backed up words cradle my mind and beads of regrets sliver down to my belly button and make their way inside.

i squeeze tight, silent, and i never let him feel what i’m really thinking.

losing love for love that i lost while i was loving this love. 

love that soon rejected, so now i’m here willing to lay down, 

willing to strip, get naked for the sake that he may undress too. 

that i may lay on his chest

and maybe

one of my many sorries that i’m steady spilling

may end of penetrating  

his mind and his mind will become my mine and my mine will be his mine 

and i can ease the case of nostalgia that lays on my soul so heavenly

brazen as i may be, brazen as i may ever be

i will be wrapped up so tightly in truth that my lies will never remind me

of those ties that i severed, those moons that i shattered,

the times i repented.

I may be married,

but I still love getting high.




when he said eat the cake…

he was talmbout buttcake?

like his booty

he was tellin her to eat his bootycake?

beyonce eat butt?

jay-z’s butt?

im bout to cry.

Ohhh shit 😳

1.There will be days when you don’t wake up feeling beautiful. Go back to sleep on these days. Set an alarm. Wake up over and over again until the sun kisses you so hard, you glow.
2. Learn to stop tattooing sad songs across your wrist. Your pulse will start sounding like a final breath, and that’s not the kind of music you want to make, baby.
3. There is an orchestra in your footsteps. There is a piano in your spine. There is poetry in your heartbeat. Your eyelashes cast shadows like stage lighting. You will wear musical notes across your chest that warn the others that this is no small production.
4. When they don’t want to love you, don’t stop singing. You can’t be everyone’s favorite song, no matter how beautiful you are.
5. Your heart isn’t clumsy just because it keeps walking into things. Sometimes, it takes a while to learn how to walk.
6. Even the stars feel dull sometimes. They’re still stars. They’re still a miracle.
7. You are still miracle. You are still miracle.
8. It’s okay if you don’t know what you’re doing. It’s okay. The trees have been alive for hundreds of years, and some days they still shake, too.
9. You are made of untranslated languages. Words no one has been brave enough to try to speak. That doesn’t make them any less holy.
10. The words inside of you can wrap around your heart like a cast. But only if you want to heal.
11. It’s time that you start wanting to heal. It’s the only way you can. It’s the only way you can.

Y.Z, Getting better (via rustyvoices)